Some things really do have simple solutions. So why is it that we spend more time trying to complicate them? We are ultimately in control of how far and destructive we want a situation to escalate to. At any moment we are capable of walking away, instead we usually stay and add fuel to the fire. If there are no current examples we can add we resort to bringing up long dead problems from the past. We depend on the other to party to provide the reaction. If it’s not the reaction we want we poke and pry until we get the one we want. Eventually walking away still unsatisfied and craving for more.
Do we engage in arguments simply to feel? Something sailing too smoothly just isn’t entertaining enough. We read into each other too much, over-analyzing every move. Simply tell ourselves that if that person is not upset once or doesn’t seem bothered by anything that they simply have checked out and are not interested in you any longer. Why would we think that? Maybe perfect does exist, a conflict free relationship. We just don’t allow ourselves to have it. Some interpret arguing as passion. It’s a gap in communication, the inability to agree on a solution. I don’t really see that as being passionate and beneficial to the relationship. Why can’t we just sit down and speak about the problem and come to a mutual agreement? If you can never agree on anything just end it. Don’t waste time trying to change the other person, you can never change a person.